Monday, February 12, 2007

Yet another blood test

Had another blood test today, but I got the bad techncian. They one who must have had a career back in the 80s as a KGB torturer. She finds the deepest vein she possibly can, ignoring my advice to use the near the surface a little to the right. 'no, you have big juicy one here. I use this one. That one too small. It won't work for long' Dude, I've had enough blood tests to know where my damn veins are and that yes they do work. Now she has to use a big honkin' needle and not my little butterfies.

I was right by the way. On the third of five vial, the 'big juicy vein' has decided not to work anymore. So what does she do? Does she listen to me, break out the butterfly and tap my little vein of perfection? Noooooooooooo, she starts digging around the inside of my arm with her big honkin' needle trying to find more blood. VAMPIRE! Shes a vampire I tell you!! So there I am, with a sadistic tech digging around my arm, and I am trying not to run screaming down the hall and in to the saftey of my mothers van. Three things stopped me. 1. I still had to pee in a cup. 2. there was a pediatrians office was a few doors down and I didn't want to scare the little kids. 3. I was sure she would have chased me with a bigger needle and tried to tap my juggular. No, I sat there, tears in my eyes and trying to thinking of bunnies and knitting (maybe knitted bunnies) and waited until she was done violating me.

So I survive my brush with evil and shakily make it to the car in extreme pain. I've never had pain after a blood test in my life. After they take the needle out the worst thing I have to deal with is the band aid (speaking of which, she managed to get arm hair stuck in mine. I have no idea how! There's no arm hair near my elbow.). Not this time. I am in pain. I ask my mom why its hurting. She told me the evil russian must have ruptured the vein and now its going to hurt, leave a very ugly bruise and maybe swell.

Greeeaaaat....

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